Connection (Part 1)

I know it’s a hassle to meet new people because we have to introduce ourselves and then start the whole “how can we connect?” process. But there is no way around it, meeting new people is a gateway to new opportunities.

When it comes to making a personal connection with someone, it’s always nice to have a facilitator; someone who introduces us and then like magic we hit it off and we don’t know how we ever lived without knowing that person sooner. I feel like I’m a magnet for connectors. I’ve been so fortunate to meet people, mostly women, who like to take me by the hand and connect me with like-minded friends. Our paths cross at the exact moment that it matters most. Facilitators have this way of reserving in their minds, who does what and/or who knows such and such. So when the timing is right, it’s like the connection was meant to be. This is a gift because not everyone is a connector. We may not acknowledge this very often but the person who introduces us is giving us a thoughtful pinch. I plan to write more about connectors in a later post. This is just part one about connection since it is a big topic.

The first “branch” of connection that I’m writing about is about being aware of a connection.

Many of us are going thru life doing our day to day and we may not have time to pause in order to notice that cool things happen because of a connection. Today was a great reminder, via two different situations, that connections are gifts. The first example is about my friend Ailana coming to town this morning. Ailana was going thru Denver on her way to Vail for a Girls Ski Trip. She was thoughtful to reach out weeks ago to plan a possible visit with me. Even though I am busy (who’s not?) I am always so touched when someone actually thinks, “Hey, I’ll be in Denver, I am thinking of Barb.” Heck, even if the person is at the airport and is just waiting for a connecting flight, I still feel flattered that they take the time to tell me that they are thinking of me. What an honor! Anyway, I digress…

Ailana, in her magical way, was able to pull off merging her law partner Dustin, who is based in Denver, her Twin Cities clients and her friends all together for a Creole brunch. After the brunch, because of Ailana, we all walked away feeling like winners because we were able to add someone new to our friend group. Ailana is like an Asian, female version of Kevin Bacon being the 6th degree between so many different people. She has always been a connector. Her memory bank of who is who and what they do for a living is amazing; it’s one of her many strengths. I want to highlight this connection today because I think it’s important to give her props for being able to see the big picture; knowing that putting us all together wasn’t a risk, it was a reward. Today I have a new friend in Denver and three new friends in the Twin Cities! For the record, this connection wouldn’t have happened if Ailana was an over-thinker like me. I’m sure that I would have thought the following if I was in Ailana’s heels:

• a white, male lawyer sitting at brunch with 5 Asian women could be uncomfortable for Dustin.

• it’s a Girls Trip with three of my good friends, stopping to see another good friend is too much for all of us.

• I want alone time with my friend who lives in Denver but since I can’t ditch the friends I came with I don’t think I can make a visit work.

• I should not mix business with pleasure on this trip so I’ll see my friend on my next trip back.

These thoughts would have prevented the brunch from happening today if it were up to me. Fortunately, the point is - it worked out. New connections were made and I was able to see a really good friend that I miss a lot.

I had a good time at brunch @ Lucile’s Creole Café. Left to Right: Ailana in her leopard, Dustin, Brianna in a black cute sleeve shirt, Lauren in the maroon Aspen, CO sweatshirt and Maria with her sexy shoulders.

Then this afternoon, I received a text from my sister-in-law thanking me for a connection that I gave her. I was perplexed, what connection? She was thanking me for introducing her to one of my newest friends in Denver. It is because of this connection that my SIL was considering selling Scout & Cellar wine. I almost fell over! How did I manage that? Here’s how: I ordered wine as Christmas gifts from my friend Daisy who is a representative for Scout & Cellar. When I was picking up the order from Daisy’s house, I mentioned that I wished my SIL could still drink wine but because of her rosacea, she had to stop. Daisy, who belongs to a Scout & Cellar group chat, said she read on the chat that someone else had that problem but doesn’t anymore because the wine they sell is cleaner. So I took a chance and had Daisy send a bottle to my SIL. Waiting until I came for a visit over the holidays, my SIL opened the bottle that I sent her. We were both hopeful. It was a success! She had no reaction to the wine and was very happy to be drinking red wine again. I didn’t think about it much when my SIL asked how she can order more. With very little effort, I addressed one email to both my SIL and Daisy and asked if Daisy could be her representative as well. Tracing back the events that lead up to the text that my SIL sent me today is super cool because it revealed the importance of this tiny but mighty connection:

1. A thoughtful wine rep gave me a suggestion.

2. I sent a thoughtful pinch (a bottle) for my SIL to try.

3. My SIL was thrilled to find something to enjoy that won’t compromise her health.

4. When my SIL was a server at high end restaurants, one of her favorite parts of her job was selling and serving wine.

5. Being a mom is my SIL’s main career but she was looking for a side hustle.

6. These newly discovered products will lead to her to help others with similar problems caused by wine.

7. Wine is one of my SIL’s passions.

8. Selling this wine is like sharing a passion. It’s the sort of “job” that most moms want: something that fulfills us without draining us or takes us away from our kids.

Here is a picture of my SIL Heather, and her daughter Rowan enjoying the game in November. This is before we discovered there is a wine that does not cause symptoms for Heather. Next NFL season, we’ll be sure to have some at the game for her to enjoy.

I wanted to relay these two totally different connections to illustrate how something as little as a thank you text, sparked me into looking for the thoughtfulness in how things unfold in our lives. People connecting people. Positive thoughts of friends making sure that new friends meet. I could have easily skipped past these two awarenesses today and it still would have been a good day for me. Fortunately, my day ended up being a GREAT one and that’s because I acknowledged these two connections. On any given day, there are probably so many more connections - we just have to sit still long enough to find them.

Pinches,

Barb