It’s a good thing my mother doesn't read my blog because this weekend my cousins challenged me to write about MILFs. You know, because MILFs and thoughtful pinches are so organically related. This challenge came about because I told the cousins about the first time I had ever heard of the term MILF years ago. The TV cameras had panned over to Steph Curry’s mom who was watching him play basketball at Davidson college. The Golden State Warrior champ was not even a pro yet. I was like, what does MILF mean? Living under a rock, I also apparently missed the part when they called Stifler’s mom a MILF in the movie American Pie. After I was briefed on the acronym, I immediately (blushed) decided to pay more attention to these women who were being regarded with a mixture of admiration, perversion and degradation all at once. I wanted to know - is being labeled as a MILF a compliment or an insult? Oooooh, I’m not sure if there was an episode for this but I just sounded like Sarah Jessica Parker’s character in Sex in the City!
Using the term MILF in our society is so on par because these days celebrity moms give birth and pose in a bikini the next day. Imagine a world where celebs are capable of carrying a baby in their stomachs for 9+ months and look as if they were never pregnant a week later. Oh wait, that happens on a daily basis. It’s a totally different world than the days when pregnant people wore bedsheets for maternity clothes and took a full year to get back to their pre-pregnancy shape. Mamas everywhere these days are challenged to look their best and as quickly after giving birth as possible. We can’t be surprised that the result is a bunch of MILFs running around.
Again the Carrie Bradshaw (Sarah Jessica Parker) in me asks - Does MILF mean a woman is only hot because she has kids but wouldn’t be considered on the same level if she didn’t? Is there an acronym for the woman with no kids? Surely every woman WANTS to feel like she still has “it” no matter how old she is and she especially NEEDS to hear that she has “it” if she has given birth at some point in her life. Don’t you think that every mother is beautiful because she brought life into this world? After performing that miracle, it’s hard not to glow. But being beautiful and being HOT are two different things. Which apparently the term MILF was born to clarify the difference. My cousin Patricia shared with me that someone called her a MILF and she was completely insulted. Not that I was ever called one before but I sort of feel like it could be compared to walking by a construction site or going into Home Depot. If those guys don’t look at me when I walk by - I think something is wrong with me. But then when they do look at me I think those guys need to get back to work!
My final Carrie Bradshaw question: Is it possible to thoughtfully regard someone who looks good without using the acronym MILF? My poor mother was sitting there with all my cousins during this whole MILF convo and she wanted to know what it stood for. I just couldn’t bring myself to telling her. No matter how many glasses of wine I had - it just couldn’t come from me. I figure she will eventually know what it stands for because the trend is on the up with so many mothers trying hard to look their best. Soon it will become such a household acronym that there will be a demand for Hallmark to start making MILF cards for Mother’s Day or at least have categories for Grandmothers, Mothers, MILFs, Sisters, Aunts in the birthday card section. And ultimately there will be a post from me suggesting ideas for thoughtful pinches on what you should give to a MILF (or a DILC).